I’ve been sucked into the #reylo fandom, it was easy to do but I didn’t imagine waking up at 6am with a fanfic in my head… (this is based around the time of ‘force-bond’ before Kylo Ren and Rey have the infamous hand touching scene!)…
He hit the metal wall. The wall vibrated mimicking his shaking limbs. He blew out a sigh of hot air, he felt himself boiling over from the anger again.
His fists strained taut by his sides. He had gloves on, last time he didn’t so imprinted semicircles marked his palms, a couple breaking his flesh to bleed.
His thoughts betrayed him to that time, it was not anger that had caused his pain it was another feeling he did not fully understand.
She fascinated him.
He quickly brought himself back into reality, his thoughts would only frustrate him further. He forcefully sat on the bed next to him, unhooked his lightsaber and turned it on. It glowed red and crackled menacingly. He stared into its threatening hue, so much violence eagerly awaiting to be unleashed.
It was like staring into a fire, calming to look at if the wisps are tamed, devastating once the fire gains its own sense of power and consumes anything in its path.
There had been a fire that night, at the pivoting point in his life. Everyone has that one moment in their life that changes everything and you know there is no chance of gaining back what you once had.
The bitter nostalgia played heavy on his tongue. That night he didn’t have time to understand his actions, his intentions had been clear so he reacted accordingly. Rage had certainly controlled him that night. Everything had happened so fast there was no time for questions or reasoning , such things wouldn’t have penetrated his hatred in that moment.
Thinking to the life before it had been shattered to show the truth behind the mirror, he had enjoyed it. The camaraderie, the teachings, he had even liked calligraphy after his father had sent him a set that had worked smoothly. He knew it had probably been stolen but he didn’t care, it fitted perfectly in his hand, like it was meant to belong to him.
He hit the wall again. The metallic sound echoed around him. He shut off the lightsaber and stretched back on the bed. He was frustrated still, he wanted so many things that were out of his reach.
A guilty pleasure could bring one thing he wanted closer but no matter how much he thought about her it didn’t always work when he wished it to connect them together. Not understanding the bond between them just made him even more curious.
Sometimes he would create silly fantasies.
One fantasy he would imagine them both sneaking off ship and stealing a couple of tie-fighters to race against each other. Actually having fun. Seeing one another smiling for once.
These were stupid fantasies but his favourite one he would allow himself to dream about would be fighting alongside each other. Not against. Making poetry with our bodies as we would swerve and strike down our enemies.
He tightly held his lightsaber by his side as he let himself drift into this dream, conjuring the biggest fantasy of all. The one that could make all others exist in reality. Him speaking those two words he is urging to utter to her, ‘join me’.
Ruling the galaxy together.
His emotions were rising, pumping through his veins. His breath quickened. He couldn’t comprehend this feeling. It felt like rage, the same burning desire, just as violent, only it came with a glimmer of hope.
…
If you read all the way through I hope you enjoyed it, I’m sorry if there are grammatical errors etc. Go easy on me please! I like to write about things I have read or watched just for fun. Please don’t copy any of the above without giving me the credit. My favourite reylo posts are the amazing fan art so thank you to all those inspiring images, quite a few I have posted and liked on my tumblr blog.
a look into the mind of a jeni 